Tuesday, June 12, 2012

Breaking through the Clouds...

There is this beautiful scene from the Lord of the Rings (Return of the King) which never fails to inspire me. It is the part where poor Frodo and Sam along with their nefarious guide, Gollum are passing through 'occupied territory' in Mordor. There were fallen statues of the Kings of old. Most were cloven and defaced. As they walked through that desolation (for Mordor was ever covered by a robe of darkness), there was a stone head of a Gondorian King by the way. Suddenly, just as Sam turned, the sun pierced through the night and the white lilies that grew around the Kings' head caught it, ablaze; and the Crownless was once again crowned King!

"Mr. Frodo, look!"
"The king has got a crown again!"- Sam

The week that was, was a witness to that event. Two bouts of darkness nearly engulfed me. Two situations and an absolute feeling of entrapment. 

It was at work and we all know how suddenly restructuring events can catch your breath and stay your heartbeat. I found myself in place where I had nothing really to contribute to the firm anymore. It was a mismatch in skills and aspirations with the tasks at hand. Another position which would have suited me fine had already gestated into two months without culminating. 

The situation- to stay and commit to the impassable or to stay and commit to the impassable. There was no choice! My distress was in the extreme. "Lord", I cried, "Where are you in my desolation?" 

This is where the real choice arose. Whether to continue into the mire of self-pity and hopelessness or to look back into the past, at the marvelous deeds the Lord had done, to renew my strength in his faithfulness, to surrender and trust again in him alone.
"But I have stilled and quieted my soul;
like a weaned child with its mother,
like a weaned child is my soul within me"
Psalms 131:2
It took recollection and surrender. It took a prayer of Faith. All I remember, as I stumbled through a daze during those days was a moment in time when I stopped and looked at the dark crowds and said, "Lord, I know you are still in control and I trust in you." That's it.

The sun broke through...