Tuesday, April 3, 2012

This is not what I planned!!!

Yup, my Lent didn't go as planned...

Remember my earlier post on how God asked me to fast off worry and I supplemented it with some of my own weebies. 

The 'Holy Week' update is that I kept up my side of the abstinence and God kept his...just not how I expected him to do it. 

Everything seems to be wrong! So wrong, wrong, wrong. Nothing I do is going as planned. I even broke my abstinence off chocolate one evening only to realise it the next evening! How lame is that? 

The top of my head seems to be going off, my cell phone konked off and I have a fever.

WAAAAAAAAAAAHHH! 

The worst is when your mind feeds itself to self-pity and gory antagonism about your nearest and dearest ones. You don't realise how the words you say and the tone you use can hurt the very ones you love...

Why Lord? Why?

The answer came this morning. I was randomly clicking through one of the Catholic links and I found this completely unrelated excerpt in one of the articles.

"As I’ve gotten older I’ve found Lent to be a very fruitful season for me. Whether or not my Lent goes as planned–and often it doesn’t–growth happens.

(An aside, when Lent doesn't go as planned, remember St. Teresa of Avila: One Lent, she had an elaborate plan of penances and mortifications. But she spent the entire season sick in bed, with others waiting on her. One day in prayer, she complained to the Lord about this. “You had your plan for Lent, but this is my plan for you,” He said)"


So Lord, if this is your plan for me, then so be it. Amen