This is not what I planned!!!

Yup, my Lent didn't go as planned...

Remember my earlier post on how God asked me to fast off worry and I supplemented it with some of my own weebies. 

The 'Holy Week' update is that I kept up my side of the abstinence and God kept his...just not how I expected him to do it. 

Everything seems to be wrong! So wrong, wrong, wrong. Nothing I do is going as planned. I even broke my abstinence off chocolate one evening only to realise it the next evening! How lame is that? 

The top of my head seems to be going off, my cell phone konked off and I have a fever.

WAAAAAAAAAAAHHH! 

The worst is when your mind feeds itself to self-pity and gory antagonism about your nearest and dearest ones. You don't realise how the words you say and the tone you use can hurt the very ones you love...

Why Lord? Why?

The answer came this morning. I was randomly clicking through one of the Catholic links and I found this completely unrelated excerpt in one of the articles.

"As I’ve gotten older I’ve found Lent to be a very fruitful season for me. Whether or not my Lent goes as planned–and often it doesn’t–growth happens.

(An aside, when Lent doesn't go as planned, remember St. Teresa of Avila: One Lent, she had an elaborate plan of penances and mortifications. But she spent the entire season sick in bed, with others waiting on her. One day in prayer, she complained to the Lord about this. “You had your plan for Lent, but this is my plan for you,” He said)"


So Lord, if this is your plan for me, then so be it. Amen

Salvation or Happiness?

This unusual reflection suddenly came upon me when I read Prof. Ratzinger's (before he became Pope Benedict XVI) lesson on happiness.


He said something which shook me to my foundations. 


The word “happiness” has gradually replaced the classic term “salvation”, in the common sentiment and speech, outside the theological context.


But how is salvation different from happiness? 


The professor says the term “salvation” meant the salvation of the world, within which the salvation of the individual person is brought about while happiness reduces salvation to an individual level, a well-being relating to the “quality” of life a person enjoys while excluding the world as a whole.


It then suddenly hit me that my entire relationship with Christ was centered around the hope that I could or would be happy being with or knowing Christ. In Catholic circles, happiness is often corrected to joy...my feeling is that, in our minds it means more or less the same thing- individualistic aspirations.


To change my mindset from the pursuit of happyness to the salvation of all mankind, makes my tiny purpose in life so much more bigger, so much more profound and yes, so much more dying to myself. It is difficult to take my eyes off 'what's in it for me?' and do it for a greater purpose.

Take the example of Mary. Did she have a happy life? Maybe; there might have been moments of happiness. Did she suffer? Dearly. The sword was prophesied from the very beginning. Why did she embrace her calling? 

Love.


Only love can bring a person to undertake such great suffering. Suffering, not for herself or for her own but for the sake of the world. Today, for her silent participation in the salvation mystery, she is hailed as Co-Redemptrix. 

What great love Our Lady must have had to embrace the very perpetrators of her sons' death as her own children? Her immense suffering expanded her heart to love a broken people like us. Hence, the Queen of Heaven also bears the title of Mother of Sorrows. 


Mary gave her all. For in love, you don't count the costs.


Coming to me. Would that I be able to give up all my hope for a happy life to full life of suffering, hope, pain and peace that many may live through me?


Discerning marriage as my vocation, I always looked to the Lord to send me the 'right' one. But what if the right one is someone who is a difficult person ? God may choose to bring about his salvation through my patient bearing and love. What if my children choose to desert the faith of their fathers and walk away? God might still ask me to bear witness to his truth, to love them, correct them, pray for them and offer my pain for their redemption...


But am I willing?

Militant who??

There is militant patriotism, militant secularism, militant atheism and even militant fundamentalism...


But here is someone new, equally menacing as he can be merciless, cold-blooded and single-minded, dead to all but his cause and dark as the night to those who oppose him, father to those who concur.


This new animal is Militant Tolerance...He, of many faces, hues and stripes. He won't stand a moral stance. It is just not done in polite society. Ever heard of him? You MUST have! At your workplace, social dos and even in your own family.


He will crush your spirit with cynicism and bite off your head with bile if you should so as much as speak about Truth and Faith. He is Pontius of the famous parody- What is Truth?

But he is Nice...Oh soo very nice. He will spout of accommodating everybody and give a patient hearing to every minority dissenting view (as long as it does not intuit moral absolutes). After all, isn't it intolerant not to hear the small man speak. He believes in transcendence. All things becoming acceptable over time. 


The one thing he will not because he cannot believe, is in moral benchmarks. "Ouch! That's not very nice." "How can you impose your beliefs and moral judgement on others? " Everybody has right to create his own 'Rights' and make his own 'Truths'. That's what the modern enlightened society is built on. 


To be nice and acceptable means to remove all semblance of Truth because Truth is absolute and so very inconvenient.  But when there is no standard to define good from evil; Nothing is good Or evil. Everything becomes a perspective. To be a militant tolerant is to believe that there is no moral authority, no ethics, no accountability and definitely no responsibility attached, in that order. 

I am not responsible for this...

But whether we believe in divine judgement or not, we must surely attest to consequences. When Truth becomes negotiable, Goodwill becomes God. Justice will fail to discern between the victim and the perpetrator, just as it failed the unborn in Wade Vs Roe and with it will go Peace and Hope...And we wonder why we have so many more wars in the 21st century than in the previous millenniums? Why school kids spray bullets on their own classmates? Why mothers take the lives of their unborn? Why people glorify self-destructiveness and condone moderation (read Lady Gaga, Amy Winehouse etc etc etc)? 
Why we Christians don't stand up and live lives worthy to be called Christ-abiders?


It's all in the name of Liberal, Tolerant Niceness.


Ever met a Militant Tolerant? Take a step back and look inside yourself...

Does God put us to the test?

This was one question a close Catholic friend of mine sent across to our group. It got me thinking...


Why would God want to put us to the test? God is omniscient. He already knows! For...


Jesus knew what was in their hearts (Matt 12:25).
Jesus knew Peter was to deny him (Matt 26:34).
Jesus knew who was to betray him (Jn 13:11).


And yet, the testing... 


It is to show to ourselves how much we truly love him. What measure of faith one has?


Even the angels had their period of testing. That's when Lucifer, the angel of light and one-third of those divine beings, chose to worship the creature and not the creator. They lost the Beatific Vision and won what they wanted. But with all things self-oriented- it corrupted from within. They got none of what they were seeking and won malice and jealousy as tribute. Not just to God but even to his beloved men


Testing is good and true! That's why God put Abraham and Job to the test. Jesus's trials in the desert was a test. Yet, how afraid I am of it? To see myself as I really am; the untrue, selfish, faithless wretch...Would that I be broken and made anew. Yet, I am so afraid of the truth, even though it is good...


O help me, Lord to trust you more each day.

Once upon a time...

In a galaxy far, far away...


I wish I could use this iconic starting line to describe the perfectly harrowing experience of another me watching a perfectly inane movie in an alternative universe


...but No. It was me and I suffered. 


The weapon of mass delusion in question is none other than the recently released 'This Means War' 

The plot is pretty simple. Boy meet girl, girl meet another boy, girl can't chose. There! That wasn't it so bad...a funny and slick production.

Except for a few things. Like the girl (a very sexy Reese Witherspoon) purposefully dangles herself before her suitors because she can't decide who to date (awww...). I mean, if a girl's spoilt for choice then why can't she make the most of it. 

But it really isn't her fault, cause the boys are actually CIA-Men-in-(Savile-Row)-Black-suits. That means they can access her secret files, order a full surveillance, just so they tailor their OTT* attempts to woo her to her minutest preference. Invasion of privacy anyone?

So, how DOES a girl choose in such a circumstance? The sex tie-breaker, of course.

Isn't it simple? A few seconds of ecstasy is absolutely enough for anyone to decide who to spend the rest of their lives with.

Then, there is her best girlfriend who...erm...let's not talk about her, shall we?

And guess what? She settles for the playboy. Woo-hoo!

Maybe I'm being too hard here. Maybe my expectations from a chick-flick were too high. But maybe, my disappointment might not have been so acute had the movie not been so utterly devoid of reality.

"So", you may say, "this lady thinks gratuitous sex does not exist? And friends-with-benefits is just a byline somewhere?" 

No! But love and true love, at that, does not work like this. Even if it is a movie, there is SOME element of truth somewhere...Take "The Proposal" for instance. There was a lot of faff, but there were moments of truth especially where Sandra Bullocks character chooses the moral high road and calls of the wedding. It brings out the humanity of the person...

Maybe, I might have still enjoyed "This Means War". If, it had, along with an (A) certificate also a statutory warning "To enjoy this movie, leave your brains behind"

* OTT= Over The Top

Who was the Woman at the well?

Her name is St. Photina (the luminous one or light) or St. Svetlana (in Russian), the Samaritan woman who encountered Jesus at the well, Holy Martyr...First Evangelist.


Yes, it was a woman again. She who encountered the Lord, left her water jug and ran back in the blazing Sun to round up her countrymen. She, of five husbands, the latest of whom was not even her spouse. She, who was the most depised of women-folk, even among her own people. She was the chosen one!


I often wonder about this lady, who lived such a slatternly lifestyle that she was too ashamed to join the other women at the well in the mornings and didn't have the hope nor the strength to make that change. She needed a saviour. Not just a pious holy man but a redeemer.


The Lord knew she was coming. So he waited...and from that beautiful encounter came forth the Living Waters.


Her feast day is commemorated on March 20.


St. Photina, Ora Pro Nobis.

Tomorrow is....

St. Patrick's Day 

Or as the Irish would put it Lá Fhéile Pádraig...

I'm feeling rather Irish myself too. So here's an Irish blessing from me to all of you

May the Irish hills caress you
May her rivers and lakes bless you
May the luck of the Irish enfold you
May the blessings of Saint Patrick behold you

May your blessings outnumber the shamrocks that grow

and may trouble avoid you wherever you go