Remembrance

God in the Old Testament was one who constantly commiserated his people to Remember.

'Tell it to your children and do not forget how the Lord delivered you from the Egyptians...'

'Remember the Lord's commands that I entrust to you today...

'Remember when your fathers forgot me in the dessert...'

Remember... Remember... Remember...

When one goes through the Night of the Senses, memories of the Lord's faithfulness and mercy can give hope even in the darkest night.

'I remain confident of this: I will see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living.'

- Ps 27: 13

It is the confidence of one who has tasted the Lord and found him true. 

Then there is another kind of reminiscence and it has nothing to do with one's memories or experience. It is a remembrance of the nature of God, who he is and how faithful he yet remains in the face of man's faithlessness. 

There is a brokenness that comes with this remembrance. Like Mary at the foot of the cross. A place of 'hoping against hope' in a God who remains silent. Nothing made sense during that dark night of her soul. There was no silver lining on Golgotha, no comfort in her loneliness. I doubt if she remembered the words of her Son about his death and resurrection; and even if she did, I wonder if it brought her any comfort while watching her firstborn torn on the cross.

And Christ, ripped from his Father's bosom, bereft of all imaginable hope and yet he said ...

'Father, into your hands I commend my spirit'

Faith shines through.

This faith is born of hope. 

'Faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see'

- Heb 11:1 

Sometimes, I do believe it translates into- Faith is being sure of Who we hope in and certain of Him who we do not see. 

Come away with me

What is intimacy?

Is it a union of two souls or two minds? Could it be that moment when a man becomes one with his wife? Could it be when two friends bond in silence, or a mother suckling her child...

or maybe, it could be all of the above.

For Christ,I think it was a little more. For Christ, it was an immersive moment. Akin to a single drop of water becoming part of a great ocean. A realization that the Lord is GOD... and I am held in the midst of his existence. 

He is "my existence". 

He is Existence.

"I am, who am"

He revealed himself to all humanity and for all time, as an invitation to a greater knowing of God- face-to-face, man to   Creator. He leans down to us. Know me, he says. Know me...

The most important prerequisites of intimacy is trust and vulnerability. He did that when he spoke his name to Moses. He showed his most vulnerable side when he became man.

Friendship, motherhood, spousal love are all relationships that grow with intimacy.

But for God, it becomes a deeper engagement. Mortal man can never bond perfectly with an immortal eternal God. So, God gave man a soul. A spirit, eternal and immortal as God is. It an intimacy of two spirits that God seeks. It goes beyond feeling, above physical bodies and remains suspended like a single drop of consciousness in an ocean of silence. A stillness... A time of completeness, at rest and in Peace.

That is intimacy with an Almighty, Eternal God. 

He meets us in the physical as he does in the spiritual. He comes to us in the Holy Eucharist, becoming one with us, nourishing us, enveloping us, overshadowing us. 

He lets us touch him because our senses are so important to us.

He woos us with his songs because our passions move us.

He bends down to us seeking intimacy and friendship. 

'Come away with me to a lonely place'

'Come abide in me, rest awhile in me'

Blessed among Women

The Bible raises a few women to look upon as an example of 'Highly Favoured', 'Richly Blessed', 'Woman of Faith' and I find myself a bit skeptical. They had hard lives, all of them. 

In ancient Israel, women and children were relegated to the fringes of Jewish society. If that wasn't bad enough, being out of sync with the norms i.e. unmarried, widowed, childless were considered curse or punishment by God. 

It was a hard life for a woman...much less one who was considered despised and abandoned by God.

Sarah was seven times widowed when we first meet her in the Book of Tobit. Seven in Jewish lore is considered a full, complete number. Sarah had drunk deep of her cup of sorrow so much so that it came to be even her servant-girl did not scruple to abuse her. The ancient community would have have denounced her worse. She was ready to take her life when she remembered her beloved father, and then turned to God.

"Lord, I look to you for help."

                                           

                                             -Tobit 3:11-12

Beyond coincidence and chance, came Tobit and the sorrows of two families came to an end. 

Then there was Rachel, Sarah, Abraham's wife and Elizabeth, Mary's cousin. Bereaved in their childlessness; yet hoping when all cause for hope was over.

Judith the young widow faced with a despondent nation and Ruth, the foreigner who chose love and loyalty over home.

"Then God remembered..."

                                - Gen 30:22

But where there is Christ, there is always Hope and (this) Hope does not disappoint. 

God will fulfill the desires of your heart, because he himself put it there. He is glorified in your joy as he glorified in your patient obedience.

When all seems bleak and the promises seem late in flowering; remember...

"For nothing is impossible for God"

                                - Luke 1: 37 

She believed...

May is nearly here- the Month of Mary.

Mary was a natural contemplation mystic. Contemplation being a form of prayer where a person turn things over, not in his or her mind but in her heart. Heart being the seat where one finds God, not quite the fluffy, pansy, emotional-driven core but a place of truth and trust. Feelings do have a play but more than that it's a place of surrender and abandonment to God.

'Do unto me as thou hast said'

Those are not easy words if one truly understood the full implication of saying them. Mary weighed the words in her heart and spoke- Fiat. A complete consummation of consent. And the history of mankind changed forever.

This May, I thought of doing Mary's Way. To contemplate and to sit abide in God. The fruit of contemplation, is surrender. But before that happens, there is something else... belief. 

I often wondered what the difference was between faith and trust and belief. This is what I understood- 

Faith is a gift. To become aware of God and trust in who he is.
Trust is confidence in the credibility of God.
Belief. I think Belief becomes more personal and intimate. Belief is a 'knowing'. It is faith in action.

Paul received the gift of Faith at Damascus. Mary (the sister of Martha) trusted Jesus to have done something to save Lazarus.

But Mary believed... she knew. Old Simeon knew he held the Messiah in his arms. He didn't need a white dove hovering over. Abraham believed God. To believe is to translate faith into action.

One of the most beautiful proofs I have read on belief is from 'The Children of Hurin' by J.R.R.Tolkien. The story is one of tragedy surrounding the family of Hurin who challenged the might of Melkor. Melkor was a fallen Elect, an immortal. Not of flesh and blood but of pure spirit. He seek to subdue all the earth and creation but the elves and men of Middle-Earth challenged him. They failed and Hurin, the leader of men was captured.

Thus begins a dissertation between Melkor the immortal and Hurin the man. Melkor tries to destroy every belief that Hurin has held sacred since his youth. 

To break a man's beliefs is to subjugate him completely. 

Man needs to believe, in order to live. 

But in the end, Hurin pronounces his one true creed- I know this and I know it with all my heart, that you are not the Lord of men and you shall never be its master.

Mary believed...

God is Just. 
God is True. 
God is Love.
God is Good.

And the scripture resounds- 'Blessed is she who believed...' 

A Prayer for Everyday

A SHORT WISH, DEAREST JESUS

Servant of God Frank Duff

Oh, my God, I do not ask for the big things - the life of the missionary or the monk, or those others I see around me so full of accomplishment, I do not ask for any of these; but simply set my face to follow out unswervingly, untiringly, the common life which day to day stretches out before me, satisfied if in it I love You, and try to make you loved. Nature rebels against this life with its never-ending round of trivial tasks and full of the temptation to take relief in amusement or change. It seems so hard to be great in small things, to be heroic in the doing of the commonplace; but still this life is Your will for me. There must be a great destiny in it. And so, I am content. And then to crown the rest, dear Jesus, I beg you to give me this, fidelity to the end, to be at my post when the final call comes, and to take my last, weary breath in Your embrace. A valiant life and faithful to the end. A short wish, dearest Jesus, but it covers all.

- Servant of God Frank Duff, Can We Be Saints ?

Amen

It is a hard prayer for those of us who find ourselves vaguely trapezing through life. But it is a good prayer and much needed one. In world where one's self-worth is measured by achievements and lauds. It hurts to take the common path. It's deeply humbling and almost embarrassing to say- I am waiting on the Lord to open new paths and doors. 

'What! You don't have a PLAN?'


Nope. I only hope to be obedient through where the Holy Spirit gently prods me go. Even when I fail to hear his voice, I trust the Holy Spirit know his way through the wilderness of my thoughts and the labyrinth of my heart. He will find me, the foolish lost sheep, the meandering coin. 

He will make this commonplace life of mine yield a song for my King. 

I do not ask to see, the distant scene

One small step enough for me

-Cardinal Newman

A Man for All Seasons

I know I haven't written anything on this blog about our new Pontiff- Pope Francis but that's just because I have been too busy celebrating and rejoicing over his election. 

But now, something has come up which has made me want to post about him. It is about that news flash where His Holiness descended from the Popemobile to greet a disabled man in the papal audience. I had seen the picture of this but the video really moved my heart. Truly, this man is chosen by God...

An Unrelenting God

There is this lovely skit by the Skit Guys called God's Chisel. It is a beautiful analogy of how we respond to God's pruning and most of the time not very well. 

The part I like is where the main protagonist begs God to leave it off him for a while, take a break, come back later, resume the work, whenever that may be. 

God sighs...

That's a problem with me. As much as I love the Lord and truly desire his will in my life, it is hard to toe the line when the going gets tough. Like the time he asked me to  forgive this really nasty person at the workplace or graciously accept a time of desolation to thaw my frozen heart. I find myself so broken that I wish (and pray) that God gives me a break. And hopefully a long break, at that. 

But this is what I have understood about the Lord. One he puts his hands to the anvil, he doesn't let go till he has fulfilled his purpose. 

The LORD will fulfill his purpose for me; thy steadfast love, O LORD, endures for ever.

- Psalm 138:8

An Unrelenting God. A Stubborn Saviour. Where would we be without him? Undone, half-done, without... 

I don't trust myself to hold on to Christ. But this I know. I can trust Christ to hold on to me, no mater what. No matter how many times I tell him to leave me alone. He won't give up on me.

Maybe it's a litany to the One I love.

No matter how many times I tell him to leave me be.
Christ won't give up on me

No matter how many times I tell him I am tired of his hand
Christ won't give up on me

No matter how many times I have given up on myself
Christ won't give up on me

For the times I have cheated, bribed, counselled and coerced Him to do my will as His
Christ won't give up on me

For the times I have fallen and couldn't forgive myself
Christ won't give up on me

For the times I have wounded his Sacred Heart 
Christ won't give up on me

For the times I have wounded and maligned his people
Christ won't give up on me

For the times I had an opportunity to proclaim his name, speak of his goodness and spread his love; and did not
Christ won't give up on me

When I gave away my time in far cheaper pursuits than knowing his command and heeding his call
Christ won't give up on me

When I am in sin and my pride prevents me from hearing the Master's call
Christ won't give up on me

To the Lord who took on torn humanity to save me
Christ won't give up on me

To the Lord who humble himself to the pits of death and hell, that I may not suffer either
Christ won't give up on me

To the unquenchable fire of his love waiting to renew me
Christ won't give up on me

Christ won't give up on me. Christ won't give up on me. Not just yet. Not ever. 

Sacred Heart of Jesus, pierced with a lance. Have mercy on us.